We live in a busy world, where externally, there are distracting temptations all around us. But what if I was to tell you that our external world has very little to do with our distractibility... it's our internal world that holds the power over whether we choose to get distracted, or not. That's right - distractibility is a choice. I'll admit though - it doesn't feel like one sometimes; especially when you have Adhd, like I do!
Do you struggle with distractibility?
Let me ask you an easier question: is there something that you'd really love to achieve in your life, that you haven't because you don't have the time... only the truth is that you do have the time - you just can't seem to prioritise the time to get it done? I see you!
I have the same struggles sometimes!
Here, I'm going to share with you two of my favourite tips to manage distractibility.
Keep a notepad with you when you complete your task. When the urge to steer away from your task comes up, I want you to stop. Ask yourself: what am I feeling right now? Remember that seeking the external distraction is just the action, it is what leads you to that desire to escape that counts. Write down how you are feeling. Name the emotion, eg: is it anger? Sadness? Anxiety? Write the name of the emotion and continue with your task. Continue this for as many times as you get distracted. Keep returning to your task. If it is the same emotion coming up and the distractibility is strong, when (and only when) you have completed your task, schedule time in your diary to further explore this emotion.
Feeling your feelings is an important part of emotional regulation. Emotions are important messages that help us to understand our reality and the more we ignore big emotions, the stronger they become. Acknowledge them, but when you are ready to.
Ensure that you are the master of your emotions and not the other way around. Treat them like a Coach who is going to teach you something - schedule it in and continue with your day.
2. When tempted to give into an impulse, tell yourself this: "in ten minutes time."
Perhaps you're tempted to smoke a cigarette, but you're trying to give up. Perhaps you want another cake but you're supposed to be limiting high calorie foods. Whatever it is, managing your impulse control is the first step to success. All too often we engage in black and white thinking when we're trying to give something up. We give up smoking and say 'never again' we go on a diet and promise: 'no cake' and then when that hard moment comes around where we want to give in, telling ourselves we will never have the thing we really, really want in that moment is deflating. It's tough. Giving yourself ten minutes grace allows you to ride out that strong urge to give in and it the temporary time limit makes it seem possible (because it totally is!) Plus, by the time those ten minutes is up, chances are you'll be so over it. Why? Because the power isn't in the ' never' it's in the now. If you can master your impulse in the now, then you win!
Need some support? Reach out for your free Consultation today. I can't wait to show you all my tools and tricks. I can't wait to learn your story and mirror back to you all the beauty in it that you may not even be able to see yourself.
Want to learn about grief and explore the beauty within the it all? Click here.
Sending you so much love & tenderness,